My Open Diary

The other day, my wonderful boyfriend gave me a beautiful bouquet of bright, yellow sunflowers.  If you don't know me already, I am a huge fan of anything yellow.  Yellow is such a happy color.  It's bright, vibrant, and just screams joy to me. When I was presented these flowers, I couldn't avoid the big smile that was tattooed on my face.  Even after I brought them home, trimmed them, and gently placed them in a vase full of nourishing water, I find myself grinning every time they catch my eye.  It's contagious. These sunflowers that sit so contently in my bedroom are a beautiful reminder as to how I believe God wants us to strive to be like everyday.  He wants us to reflect His son.  But how do we go about doing that? If you look at a sunflower, they are very similar to any other flower but at the same time holds qualities that separate them and make them stand out differently. Take the tulip for example; I absolutely adore the daintiness of tulips.  

" Listen to my words, Lord, consider my lament. Hear my cry for help, my King and my God, for to you I pray.  In the morning, Lord, you hear my voice; in the morning I lay my requests before you and wait expectantly. For you are not a God who is pleased with wickedness; with you, evil people are not welcome. The arrogant cannot stand in your presence. You hate all who do wrong; you destroy those who tell lies. The bloodthirsty and deceitful you, Lord, detest."  Psalm 5:1-6 I think we can all agree that the garbage happening in our nation, not to mention everything else going on in the world, is an absolute abomination.  It feels as though every morning we wake up to a new story covered regarding some form of hate, division, judgement, and evil.   As a human, my heart cries for all the brokenness I see everyday.  From children bullying each other to suicide, abuse in what is supposed to be a loving relationship, judging people in need, ra

Video to Poem: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NUwAQooBewM&feature=youtu.be It's disappointing when you're with someone for so long, the guy you were so confident to be Mr. Right turns out to be Mr. Wrong. Spending countless hours in the middle of the night repeating "I just want to feel wanted by him"  Questioning; Why is he too tired to have a conversation with me? I waited around all day for him. I just wanted to feel included and invited in his plans. I want him to want to be with me just as much as I want to be with him. I want him to see how much I believe in him, how much I pray for him, encourage him in his dreams and his future plans. Future plans... Do you even see me there? I know, I know, all of that rests in the Lord's hands. But I just can't help but see a beautiful future; you and me. Me, you, you, me Where can I find the Lord throughout all of my uncertainty? Uncertainty.  Such a helpless state.